The Day God Said, "No."

None of us like to hear the word no. Especially from the one in charge. Because, the one in charge has the final say, and we know that, that is the word that goes. So then we have to figure out what we're going to do with that "No."
My first response when He said no, was of course, tears. Lots of them. Then I grieved heavily for a long time. Then I got mad. Then I began to accept the no on many different levels, but continued to take the "no acceptance" back time and time again. Shaking my head and fist thinking, "this certainly could not have been for real."
But it was for real.
I look at the process I went though as I reeled around and around from that "no" and I wish I would have been able to just say, "OK Lord, your will be done. It's not my life, it's yours, do with it what you will."
I wish that had been my initial response.
But it wasn't. I know He doesn't blame me, nor is He angry with me for my response. But still, when God says no, it's hard. He must know it's hard...because He lets us process. He never shamed me or made me feel like I was less His child because I struggled with His no...( like I sometimes can do when my children real at my no's.) He just let me process and so I did.
Over the years as the "no" became my reality some would say that I just got used to my no, but I beg to differ. His no changed me.
I'll tell you what I can see as of now from His "no."
It has made me more compassionate towards others who have received a no. It has made me watch my words, and check my heart, and consider how others might perceive the way I speak of things that they do not have.
DO I appear to be taking something I already have for granted? I check my heart on that quite frequently.
I recognize that what I always want for myself is not what is best for me. Of course we know this in our heads, but getting our hearts to comprehend this is quite another thing. That is what GOD'S no, did for me. It allowed my heart and it's understanding of not "getting what I want all the time..." and to respond in a God honoring way.
Are there days I still ask God to change His mind? Absolutely. Are there days I don't beg Him to change His no to a yes?! Absolutely. And could shock me with a "yes" at some point? Yes! He's God! He's sovereign!  And His plans are perfect. But I will tell you what is different about the way I think about His "no" now. My hope does not rest in the "yes." My hope lies in the person of Jesus Christ. He is unchanging, unfading and always present. Therefore I will not fear. Though the earth quake and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, I will not fear. (Psalm 46) My God is perfect and in control and I know that He planned things for me since before the foundations of the Earth were put into place (Ephesians 1:4) and I cannot argue with His word when He tells me that He has plans to prosper me and not to harm me." (Jeremiah 29:11) God is good. Even when He says no.
The process through which we all come to understand His sovereignty is as different as we all are, and if you are currently on the heals of hearing a "no" from your divine creator, do not despair. Go through the process, but don't fight the No. Rest in His hands, rest in His twisting and turning of your broken dreams, and know that only when the Master has shaped things the way He knows they will be best, will He rest.
HE is twisting your story upside down? Have all the pieces and cards you held crashed to the floor beneath you? Do not despair. Trust. Rest. Rest in His word, that is truth. Run to His word because it will fill you with the strength you need. He is making you better, He is making you useful. Be bendable. Be mold able. Let your body fall into His hands and let Him use you as He  knows you will be used. In this place you will have the most peace, and the most contentment. It's when we fight His molding that we find real pain. The pain that will not go away.
The nights I cried with a heart so heavy it quite literally drug me to the floor, I was not at peace as I fought His will and plans for me. But when I succumbed, and trusted and then finally, rested in His plan, the peace like a river that I had always heard about but never experienced until then, flooded in.

"Be still and know that I am God ...." Psalm 46:10

Dear Mother of Children---- Childless

As I sat in church that day I had never felt more alone. I felt like someone had placed the "dunce" hat on my head to wear for the duration of the service. It really wasn't anyones fault, and I know that no one intended to make me feel this way, but I felt so empty. I had lost a baby a the month before, and now here I sat, on Mothers Day, with no baby. Years later as I reflect on that painful Mothers Day it makes me think about all the women who are Mothers in their hearts, but hold no baby in their arms. Mothers Day is a special day, and it's nice to have a day to honor those who have labored and spent their lives caring for children, and to honor your own Mother. This is really noteworthy. Just like a Birthday. It's fun to celebrate the day that God brought you into the world. But for those who are not mothers, and want to be, Mothers Day can be very painful.
Even for those who have totally found their identity in Christ and who are wrapped up in His love, still feel. They still can experience feelings of sadness over not having children in their arms that are their own.
Mothers, you are a mother because God put you there in that place. He asked you to care for some of His creations and requestsed that you do it for His glory.
Women who are not phyiscal mothers, God also handed you a package. It was not a baby of your own, but it may have been the little nieghbor girl who's mother left. Or, the child at the grocery store that you waved to, smiled at and said Hi to. Perhaps you noticed an un-noticed child, and made that child's day.
The other possible contents of the package could be wrapped up in millions of different ways that GOD has asked you to serve Him and to care for His creations. You are not less important because you were not handed the package labeled "baby."

That dreadful Mothers Day I experienced some 9 years ago, I went through without Jesus. I was not walking with Him then as I am now, and I see how dark and sad I was. I was looking for my identity in the form of children.
We as mothers do this far too often. Our children become our everything, and we get wrapped up in them. Rather than viewing them as blessings and an opportunity to bring GOD glory with how we raise them, we build our lives around them.
Dear Mother of Chidlren please be sensitive. The woman next to you who does not have children does not need to hear about your children, how many you have and how easy it was for you to conceive them. I know you may not mean any harm, but please be prayerful about the way you carry yourself this Mother's Day. Be thankful in your heart, wise with your mouths and gracious with each word you speak.
Be a blessing. Be mindful of those around you who may be struggling.
For the woman who is not holding children, it may be the point  where her heart is given freedom if she sees a mother with children being compassionate towards her in her childless estate.
I'm not trying to be controversial, and I 'm not trying to point fingers or make any blessed Mother feel badly. You are, as GOD placed you.
But help those who are struggling. Be a servent. Even on Mothers Day.
A mother might say, "but this is one day to honor me!" And I undesrstand these feelings as well, but it's like Valentines Day for the one who is single. For the single woman on valentines day, it's more like, "curl up and cry day" than it is "celebrate love" day.
You don't know where someone's heart is at. And saying, "they shouldn't feel that way" is liketelling a   grieving person not to grieve.
Everyone is on their own road to wholeness, and Jesus will and is working on His children's heart in His perfect timing. So be careful not to hinder the gospel, even in the way you celebrate your special day. I'm not saying don't enjoy your day, I'm saying, being mindful first of other people before you consider youself.
DO to others as you would have them do to you. That is the gospel of Matthew's golden rule.
Dear Woman with other blessings, you are loved. You are not less of a woman because of your life calling. Who God made you to be is perfect just as you are. Lay yourself into the hands of Jesus. You will find you're peace and joy there. Hope is found Jesus, not in what we are or are not blessed with. Who you are to the children of this world that you come into contact with is precious.
You have spiritual children, and you are right where GOD wants you as you run after His will for you're life. You are not less of a person, or unblessed because you do not have children. Take total joy in the fact that you have  a God who is doing what is best for you, all the time.

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:10 NLT)

Ask God today dear Woman what God has for you that He planned for you long ago. Perhaps you have never done this, and maybe you have and this is just a good reminder. 
And know this:
You are perfect, precious and exactly the way God wanted you dear woman without children. 
And Dear Mother, You are precious, and perfect and exactly where God wants you. Be a blessing both of you, and in turn you both will bring GOD much glory.
 For what is it that we are to say??? IN all things, TO GOD BE THE GLORY.