The Day God Said, "No."

None of us like to hear the word no. Especially from the one in charge. Because, the one in charge has the final say, and we know that, that is the word that goes. So then we have to figure out what we're going to do with that "No."
My first response when He said no, was of course, tears. Lots of them. Then I grieved heavily for a long time. Then I got mad. Then I began to accept the no on many different levels, but continued to take the "no acceptance" back time and time again. Shaking my head and fist thinking, "this certainly could not have been for real."
But it was for real.
I look at the process I went though as I reeled around and around from that "no" and I wish I would have been able to just say, "OK Lord, your will be done. It's not my life, it's yours, do with it what you will."
I wish that had been my initial response.
But it wasn't. I know He doesn't blame me, nor is He angry with me for my response. But still, when God says no, it's hard. He must know it's hard...because He lets us process. He never shamed me or made me feel like I was less His child because I struggled with His no...( like I sometimes can do when my children real at my no's.) He just let me process and so I did.
Over the years as the "no" became my reality some would say that I just got used to my no, but I beg to differ. His no changed me.
I'll tell you what I can see as of now from His "no."
It has made me more compassionate towards others who have received a no. It has made me watch my words, and check my heart, and consider how others might perceive the way I speak of things that they do not have.
DO I appear to be taking something I already have for granted? I check my heart on that quite frequently.
I recognize that what I always want for myself is not what is best for me. Of course we know this in our heads, but getting our hearts to comprehend this is quite another thing. That is what GOD'S no, did for me. It allowed my heart and it's understanding of not "getting what I want all the time..." and to respond in a God honoring way.
Are there days I still ask God to change His mind? Absolutely. Are there days I don't beg Him to change His no to a yes?! Absolutely. And could shock me with a "yes" at some point? Yes! He's God! He's sovereign!  And His plans are perfect. But I will tell you what is different about the way I think about His "no" now. My hope does not rest in the "yes." My hope lies in the person of Jesus Christ. He is unchanging, unfading and always present. Therefore I will not fear. Though the earth quake and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, I will not fear. (Psalm 46) My God is perfect and in control and I know that He planned things for me since before the foundations of the Earth were put into place (Ephesians 1:4) and I cannot argue with His word when He tells me that He has plans to prosper me and not to harm me." (Jeremiah 29:11) God is good. Even when He says no.
The process through which we all come to understand His sovereignty is as different as we all are, and if you are currently on the heals of hearing a "no" from your divine creator, do not despair. Go through the process, but don't fight the No. Rest in His hands, rest in His twisting and turning of your broken dreams, and know that only when the Master has shaped things the way He knows they will be best, will He rest.
HE is twisting your story upside down? Have all the pieces and cards you held crashed to the floor beneath you? Do not despair. Trust. Rest. Rest in His word, that is truth. Run to His word because it will fill you with the strength you need. He is making you better, He is making you useful. Be bendable. Be mold able. Let your body fall into His hands and let Him use you as He  knows you will be used. In this place you will have the most peace, and the most contentment. It's when we fight His molding that we find real pain. The pain that will not go away.
The nights I cried with a heart so heavy it quite literally drug me to the floor, I was not at peace as I fought His will and plans for me. But when I succumbed, and trusted and then finally, rested in His plan, the peace like a river that I had always heard about but never experienced until then, flooded in.

"Be still and know that I am God ...." Psalm 46:10

Dear Mother of Children---- Childless

As I sat in church that day I had never felt more alone. I felt like someone had placed the "dunce" hat on my head to wear for the duration of the service. It really wasn't anyones fault, and I know that no one intended to make me feel this way, but I felt so empty. I had lost a baby a the month before, and now here I sat, on Mothers Day, with no baby. Years later as I reflect on that painful Mothers Day it makes me think about all the women who are Mothers in their hearts, but hold no baby in their arms. Mothers Day is a special day, and it's nice to have a day to honor those who have labored and spent their lives caring for children, and to honor your own Mother. This is really noteworthy. Just like a Birthday. It's fun to celebrate the day that God brought you into the world. But for those who are not mothers, and want to be, Mothers Day can be very painful.
Even for those who have totally found their identity in Christ and who are wrapped up in His love, still feel. They still can experience feelings of sadness over not having children in their arms that are their own.
Mothers, you are a mother because God put you there in that place. He asked you to care for some of His creations and requestsed that you do it for His glory.
Women who are not phyiscal mothers, God also handed you a package. It was not a baby of your own, but it may have been the little nieghbor girl who's mother left. Or, the child at the grocery store that you waved to, smiled at and said Hi to. Perhaps you noticed an un-noticed child, and made that child's day.
The other possible contents of the package could be wrapped up in millions of different ways that GOD has asked you to serve Him and to care for His creations. You are not less important because you were not handed the package labeled "baby."

That dreadful Mothers Day I experienced some 9 years ago, I went through without Jesus. I was not walking with Him then as I am now, and I see how dark and sad I was. I was looking for my identity in the form of children.
We as mothers do this far too often. Our children become our everything, and we get wrapped up in them. Rather than viewing them as blessings and an opportunity to bring GOD glory with how we raise them, we build our lives around them.
Dear Mother of Chidlren please be sensitive. The woman next to you who does not have children does not need to hear about your children, how many you have and how easy it was for you to conceive them. I know you may not mean any harm, but please be prayerful about the way you carry yourself this Mother's Day. Be thankful in your heart, wise with your mouths and gracious with each word you speak.
Be a blessing. Be mindful of those around you who may be struggling.
For the woman who is not holding children, it may be the point  where her heart is given freedom if she sees a mother with children being compassionate towards her in her childless estate.
I'm not trying to be controversial, and I 'm not trying to point fingers or make any blessed Mother feel badly. You are, as GOD placed you.
But help those who are struggling. Be a servent. Even on Mothers Day.
A mother might say, "but this is one day to honor me!" And I undesrstand these feelings as well, but it's like Valentines Day for the one who is single. For the single woman on valentines day, it's more like, "curl up and cry day" than it is "celebrate love" day.
You don't know where someone's heart is at. And saying, "they shouldn't feel that way" is liketelling a   grieving person not to grieve.
Everyone is on their own road to wholeness, and Jesus will and is working on His children's heart in His perfect timing. So be careful not to hinder the gospel, even in the way you celebrate your special day. I'm not saying don't enjoy your day, I'm saying, being mindful first of other people before you consider youself.
DO to others as you would have them do to you. That is the gospel of Matthew's golden rule.
Dear Woman with other blessings, you are loved. You are not less of a woman because of your life calling. Who God made you to be is perfect just as you are. Lay yourself into the hands of Jesus. You will find you're peace and joy there. Hope is found Jesus, not in what we are or are not blessed with. Who you are to the children of this world that you come into contact with is precious.
You have spiritual children, and you are right where GOD wants you as you run after His will for you're life. You are not less of a person, or unblessed because you do not have children. Take total joy in the fact that you have  a God who is doing what is best for you, all the time.

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:10 NLT)

Ask God today dear Woman what God has for you that He planned for you long ago. Perhaps you have never done this, and maybe you have and this is just a good reminder. 
And know this:
You are perfect, precious and exactly the way God wanted you dear woman without children. 
And Dear Mother, You are precious, and perfect and exactly where God wants you. Be a blessing both of you, and in turn you both will bring GOD much glory.
 For what is it that we are to say??? IN all things, TO GOD BE THE GLORY.

Today I Stopped (my to-do list)

To be honest, I really don't like reading books to my kids. I know it's terrible. But it's not something I have made a great habit of doing. I have had much mommy guilt over this little truth But now my secret is out.
Today, it was a rainy sunday. I wanted to do many things inside. Cleaning projects, organizing, and such....
So I prayed as I often do throughout my day that God would help me to be "productive" and that I would complete the tasks He wanted me to do today.
Turns out, God's to do list for me was different that my to do list for myself.
As a mom, if you are one you'll know, there are many a task that one wakes up with in their minds to accomplish. She (the mother) sets out to do this and that, and keep her little home afloat and her children alive and if she's lucky, she gets a shower. (on a good day)
SO goes the life of a mommy.
But lists seem to grow as the children do, as I recognize that my "me time" slowly is slipping from my grasp as well. And I'd be lying if I said I am not at war with with my responsibilities at times. Today though The Lord (without my knowing it) focused me on what was really important. Today I read books. For a long time. A really long time. :) I put down my broom, (twice) and went into play Barbies.  Anyone else every been shocked by how creative their children are?! I was today. They live in a beautiful make-believe world of dress up, and daring knights and fancy dresses. I loved every minute of it. I took lots of pictures.
It was a little bitter sweet because I realize that this type of magic happens every day, and I miss it. I'm not beating myself up, because I realize that meals have to be made, and house has to stay somewhat in order in order for a home to feel peaceful, but I also realized a new truth: I can take a few minutes and play Barbies and make my girls's day. I can turn on the Disney cd, and dance around the room while I clean. I can be the Mother God can empower me to be, if only I ask.
I can enjoy the little magical moments, and it's a gift to enjoy those moments. Today was the kind of day that made me stop and think about how blessed I am. Today was the kind of day that I ended with a sense of real thanksgiving in my heart because of the miracle of life that I get to experience each and every day. I felt the spark today.
It's usually the little moment that I feel too swamped to take that would change the way I feel about the way I parent. When my children feel cared for, and loved, and important they don't nag. Or complain as much. They say things like "your the best mom ever," and "this was the best day ever." I smiled when my five year old daughter grabbed my face in her sweet little hands tonight and said, "today was the best day ever Mom!" She felt the difference, and so did I. I kissed her forehead and said, "Yes it was." because Yes, it was a great day. And because of God, and His amazing grace, every day can be the best day ever. He always takes the time to dance with me. To talk. He's always there. And He is not only my great supplier, He is my example. What HE has, is available to me, and He made that very clear to me as I prayed today, "Lord, help me to be productive." AND praise Jesus that HE told me that today, the laundry and dishes could wait. SO NO. My laundry did not get done. And my dishwasher is finally running, and I think there might still be Ketchup sitting on the table from tonight's dinner, but honestly, I really don't care. Today I felt His hand and His presence as I sat and just enjoyed my wonderful children. So tomorrow as I pray for productivity, I know He will lead me again as He sees fit, but in every productive day, I will also pray for moments. Moments to stop. TO listen and to be. Just to be still, and actually listen to my children's responses. To pay attention. TO give them focus time. TO play barbies or ninjas, or princess, whatever the flavor of the day is. Truly...I have but one life. And with Christ I can live it to the full...His way...His time. I am so thankful for this beautiful day that I almost missed because of my "to-do" list.

Let's Be Real (For Real)

He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. (Hebrews 11:25 NIV)

Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them. (Hebrews 11:16 NIV)

“To what can I compare this generation? They are like children sitting in the marketplaces and calling out to others: “ ‘We played the pipe for you, and you did not dance; we sang a dirge, and you did not mourn.’ (Matthew 11:16, 17 NIV)

Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, (Ephesians 6:7 NIV)

The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time. The Lord regretted that he had made human beings on the earth, and his heart was deeply troubled. So the Lord said, “I will wipe from the face of the earth the human race I have created—and with them the animals, the birds and the creatures that move along the ground—for I regret that I have made them.” But Noah found favor in the eyes of the Lord. (Genesis 6:5-8 NIV)

All these scriptures are verses that ought to make us think. You are here, I am here on earth for a few years. God created us. This truth we know. You and I are not here by chance or accident. Your parents did not accidentally conceive you even if they said it was an accident. It was not. God planned you. SO this begs the question of "why?" Why did He plan you? Why did He put you here?

Let me jump ahead, now you are 20, 30, 40 something...have you figured out why your here? To work a good job...to raise a family? To find love, to be love...what? What is your purpose...

Skip ahead again...
Your on your death bed... What is your "claim to fame.." are you comfortable in saying, "I lived a good life, I worked hard, and now I'm dying and that is all there is?" I'm going into the ground and there I'll stay. I cease to exist. I have no soul. I have no aftermath. I have no life to look forward to after death?
And if you believe you are going to an after-death place..where did you get that idea? What do you base your belief on? Where did you find your truth to base your confidence in as your life on earth slips away from you?
Good questions.
If you don't know the answers to these questions, no matter how old you are right now, it may be time to start questioning and seeking these answers.
I know, as I read Gods word, (the absolute truth) (how do I know it's the absolute? because I choose to believe that Gods plan is the only plan. All the other plans fail because they are human based. If you were trace them back to their beginning, they are based on human origin, and man is flawed, since the time of Adam.) Gods word tells me from start to finish all about His plan, man's sin and our way out, our escape.
Jesus, the nails that would be pounded through His hands, His life that was given for mine, and then, His  raising from the dead, ascension into heaven, His GIFT of the Holy Spirit and His plan for us depicted on all the pages of HIS word.  Tell me, beyond my ability to comprehend, that He in fact has a plan for my life, one that makes sense, and is learned, and followed a day a time.
I just find myself astounded that we as humans would rather live for ourselves for a few meaningless days and pleasure filled ways, than trust in a plan that has been set in place since before the foundations of the earth were laid. Before the earth was, Gods plan for YOU was already in place. Think about that. NO. really. THINK ABOUT THAT. Isn't that astounding?
Maybe you want to take a second and ponder in your heart how you really feel about all this.
Do you live a life that is centered on what YOU will do for that day, how YOU will make yourself feel good that day, how YOU will do nice things for other people based on how YOU feel about things? Or do you start your day asking GOD who made you, what HE wants for you, what HE has planned for you that day, how HE will have you impact the lives of those around you.
The bare reality is this: One day YOU will die. Your breath will cease to flow through your lungs, it will stop providing your body with life blood and life as you know it, will end. Just like that.   Is this thought alarming to you?
It doesn't scare ME one bit.
IN fact, it excites me. "Death is just a doorway to take me to my Faithful Lover. The lover of my soul." says a line in one of my favorite rap songs.

I think in the rush of each day, we live our every 24 hours based on emotions we have, feelings we go through and confusion that ultimately ends in many disappointments. I absolutely know these feelings because I lived my life this way for 24 years. Now on the other side of the coin as I have put my trust on Someone greater than myself, I see the polarizing difference of a life wrapped up in Jesus, Vs. a life wrapped up in myself.
I just feel like saying, "Let's be real!" Think about life in terms of your 80 to 90 years and consider, who your' living for, why and what the point of life is. What is the point?
My Point is the hope I have wrapped up in The Lord JESUS Christ. The one who guards my life, runs my life and set me free from fear of death.
O the hope that lies in just that one line.
If you have not thought about the things I am writing about, then perhaps you should. But I challenge you, to pray. Pray about these things, to the unseen God, and ask Him to reveal Himself to you. It is as simple as this. You can do it anywhere, anytime, and you can pray just as you are. With a sincere heart, wanting to hear from GOD.
You and the creator of the world can have a relationship. He will encourage you, give you life and grant you guidance hope and peace as you walk this earth.
You need only to call upon His name, and listen.
There are no magical words, no secret formula, no chant, no book that will tell you "this is the way you get God to hear you."
He only asks we come to Him with a sincere heart. One that is waiting upon Him.
Do so today. DO so right now. Ask Him.
Your life depends on it even though you may not know it.

I WILL earn my salvation

Heresy! Cries everything in me. And yet, my actions and my thinking slip down that path so easily. I come from a line of thinking that say's, "I will DO just a little bit more to earn His love." I'm always trying to BE a "good little girl" to earn God's love. This thinking is so flawed and I know it is, but I constantly have to fight the urge to try to be better for Him. When in reality from the moment He scooped me up and placed me on His heavenly lap He viewed me as holy and blameless, and my sins were forgiven. I have to remind myself that this is the reason that Christ came to the cross to deliver me from my striving. Striving has ceased! No more striving! No more trying just a little harder. No more walking on pins and needles, hoping  I did enough to earn His forgiveness. To try and earn forgiveness is to discredit the cross. There is nothing I can DO right now that will make Him love me more than He did the moment He went to the cross for me. He loved me then, as He loves me now, and no amount of walking little old ladies across the street will put me in better standing with my Lord.

"For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive in the Spirit. (1 Peter 3:18 NIV)"

"When they came together in Galilee, he said to them, “The Son of Man is going to be delivered into the hands of men. They will kill him, and on the third day he will be raised to life.” And the disciples were filled with grief. (Matthew 17:22, 23 NIV)"

Jesus spent a lot of His "career" time on earth telling His followers that He was going to die. So either His disciples thought that Jesus had some sort of obsession with death, or they realized that there was something bigger than them going on here, and they had better listen and pay attention.
Don't you think that if there was some other way for sins thirst to be quenched and for forgiveness to be made available to us, Jesus would have taken that route? Don't you think that God would have made a different way if there had been a better way? Yes! But there was no better sacrifice for my sin that Jesus Christ. HE was perfect and spotless, clean in every way. The ultimate payment for our sin. And to say there is a better way is to elevate ourselves above God, and claim to that we would have done it differently although is feels as though we are looking out for Christ's best interests, it instead points to the fact that we like Peter, have in mind the things of man, and not God.

God did what only GOD could. By sending Jesus, He took away the sins of the world, for those who call upon His name, answer His call and receive the gift of grace and salvation. The gift also comes with the added extras, it comes with the ability to cease fire. We no longer have to strive. To earn. To feel the guilt if we didn't meet the daily quota of good deeds. My whole being breaths a sigh of relief.

All I can say is "thank you Lord." This freedom that He has offered me, (and you) makes me want to live a life of obedience to Him.
I'm sure you've heard the song, "Obedience is, the very best way, to show that you believe!" And it is.  After reading the book of Micah last night I left that book feeling a renewed sense of why we obey.
however strange it may seem these words came flying off the page to me,
"Heed the rod, and the One who appointed it." (Micah 6:9b) Heed the rod? Simply means to me, respond in obedience, for God is behind the direction or He is in this.
Doesn't that just come full circle and land me back on my earning His LOVE? NO! This is actually the beautiful melody of love that a heart sings when it's been set free. The song of obedience flies out your finger tips, and comes dancing out of your heart when you realize all that He did for you. You long to be obedient to the One who gave His very life for yours, so you didn't have to strive in your own strength, for you own salvation. My debt was paid. My sins are forgiven, and the chains on my wrists were unlocked so now I am free to use both hands to serve Him. And willingly I do so, because I realize all that He did.
I obey not to earn His love, but to rather to show my love for Him. The very word love implies that you are doing what is in the best interests of the one you love. To look out for the best interests of Jesus, for the integrity of the gospel and for the furthering of the Kingdom. To obey says, "Thank you Jesus for what you did for me."
And for the days I "screw up" royally, and do not fame the name the set me free, HE has grace and forgiveness for me in my folly. It's not a checks and balance system for Him. Nor is He waiting for me to screw up so He can say, "I told you so."
Grace is grace. It doesn't change. Neither does is love for me.
SO the next time I, (or you) start to consider either how badly we screwed up, or how great we did and "God must be so proud of me..." We ought to re-check, and check again, that it really is only by the grace of God that we are forgiven. Not by works. SO that NO one can boast.

"because of the surpassing grace of God in you. Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!" 

2 Cor. 9:15

"Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

Hebrews 12:2

It is finished was His cry. The wrath of God was satisfied, every sin on Him was laid. OUR PENALTY HAS BEEN PAID!!!!

The Great Unknown

Many I times I feel as if The Lord is asking me, "Will you go there, do that, say this, even if you don't know the outcome or the reason why?"
Will I trust Him when I can't see beyond my nose? Will I walk forward when He tells me to come, just because I hear my Fathers voice, and I trust that more than I trust the security of the known? The answer lies in one simple answer. It's either "yes" or "no".
Think about a child. Consider how they are, they come when you call because they hear their mother or Fathers familiar voice. They associate trust with that voice and whether or not they know why, they come a'runnin. I know my children are that way. Listen to what Jesus says in Matthew 18:3
"And He said: Truly I tell you, unless you CHANGE and become like little children, you will never enter the Kingdom of Heaven."

It's doesn't mean we need to forget our manners, start wearing diapers again and picking our noses! He is relating to the way children are faith-filled by nature. Trusting without wavering. This is the quality we are to possess in increasing amounts. Jesus wants my heart to follow after His voice whether I "get it" or not. Whether it makes sense in my mind, or not. HE wants me to follow.  This is not easy to do as adults. We have our roots down deep quite often, and it's very uncomfortable to change. but we must  if He says so. If out of the dark night and stormy seas, you hear is voice call out to you to come, you must. I must.  There is such a vulnerability that comes with living the Christian life. God constantly asks us to be open before Him. Be able and ready to bare all if asked. To surrender all we are to His mighty hand and rest in the shadow of His wings.

The reason we can be at peace in the great unknown is because of the pure and simple fact that we know He is trustworthy. Not only is He trustworthy, He is sure, constant and as study as the rising sun.
(which He created by the way)
And in all honesty, wouldn't we rather rest in the trustworthy unknown than the safe ground that we have no business being on?
God may not always feel as comfortable as our well worn sweatshirt, but HE is the best (the better) choice to find comfort in, even if His comfort finds us the great unknown place of life.
I trust Him enough to be in the place the I do not recognize because I know without a shadow of a doubt that He is with me. And He is better than anything familiar I will ever hold. It's scary to admit this, but at the same time, it's not. It's scary because my flesh likes what is well known. We are by nature habit forming and our lives can become one big habit, if we are left to our demises. But God is not willing to let me live each day in my comfortable pattern. He sometimes asks us to change because change is essential if we are going to grow.
The tiny seed in the ground does not become the beautiful flower until she is placed in a dark, cold, place. The poor little seed must feel so alone down there a foot beneath the surface. She might cry saying, "Lord, I can't even see the sun from down here." But it's as if The Lord says, "Just wait sweet little seedling. You will see the sun in all it's glory. Just wait for the right time." SO the seed sits. She suddenly begins to feel her familiar shell crack. The shell she had since she was created! She gasped at the horror of it all. Her shell, her nice safe shell, was cracking and revealing a very tender, vulnerable little stem that began to push through the dirt. As the days and weeks passed, the little seed didn't even know what "normal" felt like anymore. SO much of her had changed, she couldn't even tell, was she up? Was she down? She didn't know, so once more she cried out to the One who sees..."Lord she cried! Where are you? I don't even recognize myself anymore!" "I see you!"  He replies..."you are where you need to be. Trust me. I'm watching over you." SO she stayed in the ground. Till at last the little seed felt a new sensation, one glorious day, she felt her little face break through the surface of the deep, dark ground. " The Sun! The SUN SHE CRIED! " She was overwhelmed, she hadn't felt warmth for so long. She gazed up at it's beauty. "Lord!" She cried with joy..."I can see the sun..." The Lord smiled. "Now do you see little seed? " The little seed who had now become a little flower replied, "Yes Lord, I see. " "Trust me He said...and grow.." So she grew. She grew up to the sky as high as could. Each day the sun would warm her leaves, and in the evening the rain would water her roots so she was able to grow more the next day. All the while she remembered her dark days that she spent back when she was just a little seed. She couldn't believe what God had done, and how He made her grow.
If she had stayed a little seed, none of this would have ever happened....

I want to be, where He wants me. Because I know with all my heart and soul...God knows best. Who knows where that will be in 10 years. Who knows where that will be tomorrow. But regardless, I know, He knows. And that my friends, is all I need to know.

Yesterday

We have all said it, "I wish it was like it 'used' to be." Maybe not about every aspect of our yesterday, but really, in some cases, yesterday can appear better than what we are dealing with right now. It's easy for grown ups, like you and I to wish for the carefree days of our youth, or childhood. When we would run barefoot in the open field and play games with our friends, not having a care in the world and letting our parents deal with all the issues of real life. I'm guilty sometimes of wishing for such things to return. Sometimes, it's just remembering good memories. And there is nothing wrong with that. But other times, these memories sit in my gut, and resonate until discontentment with today begins to take deep root. Suddenly today begins to look less and less appealing, and then I want to escape. It affects my outlook on life and my outlook on reality. Dreams are called dreams for a reason, they are dreamy! Warm, delightful, and rose colored. Dreams are a lot like memories. So wether we are dreaming of a better today, or living in the past, either one can become a stumbling block. On one hand, dreams are great. They push me forward towards something I want to attain, a goal I want to reach, but they also cause me to not live in today if I take my dream too far.
Why all this focus on memories and dreams?  I will tell you why.
Something concrete is this: Jesus is with you right now. Something real: God created you to live each day, as each day comes. Something to stand on: Today is the day you are living in. There is something raw, real and brave about looking at today, square in the face and saying, "IN all this I am more than a conqueror through Christ Jesus." Romans 8:37
It's easy to slip into "yesterday" because it's well worn, well known, and comfortable. Unlike today, today can feel scary. It's the unknowns of today that can cause some people to simply pull the covers up over their faces and roll over into what feels safe.
Is this the type of life that God has planned for us? I would venture to say NO. (although a nice lazy day is welcome once and while.) But really, I believe that although each day and it's unknowns are frightening sometimes, the unknowns are also amazing opportunities to see God do something amazing.
I wish I could list all the times throughout every day, when God surprised me with how HE worked it out, all for His glory, and my good. When I let God have my thoughts, my ways, and my days, I am always astounded with what He does with them. HE turns something meek, gray and ugly into something amazing I could have never imagined. Can life be scary? Yes. Can the unknowns be dismal? Yes, in the flesh they can. Or, we can turn that glass around, and see it the way God does. He gives us roughly what, 12 to 15 hrs each day, to do, and be and live out His plans...then we rest hopefully...
What shall we do with these wakeful hours? Will we run towards the light with our eyes set fast on His truth? Will we pray without ceasing as we come upon a curve that we cannot see around? Will we pray for strength as we see the bumps in the road ahead? As we anticipate what will come up next? Will we hold to the faith when we see a shadow land ahead? Or will we turn around and run back to what seems sunny, and comfortable?
I would challenge you friend, don't turn around. Don't say, "why were the old days better." Press on. Keep the course. Fight the good fight. Keep your gaze fixed with His. And walk forward into the unknowns, no matter how your hands may tremble, know that He will not ask you to walk through something He does not plan help you finish.
A person needs to only spend a few moments in the Psalms to see that God asked David to go through some dark valleys, but David is quoted as saying, "with God I can scale any wall." And for David, those were literal walls! The walls or bumps we may face are not always literal, but they are just as trying. But the same God who helped David, is with us today. Isn't that amazing and comforting?
SO friend, don't despair if today feels hard. Don't turn on your heals and run back to yesterday, even though it feels better, it's not. Yesterday is over. Remember it with fondness, but then turn your face towards the sun and press on. Strength for today, and bright hope for tomorrow. That's what Jesus gives us.

I'll close with the Psalmist's words, "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, your rod and your staff, they comfort me. " Psalm 23

David got it right. He knew that no matter the dark valley he walked through...he did not walk it alone.