My worst enemy

Is me. Or, at least my selfish ambitions. SOOOO much good can be done. So many people to that God puts in our path to encourage, help and lift up. However, when I do these things, who may I ask am I letting take the glory? Yes...this stings a bit doesn't it. I know. I realize now that much of what I do, is so that people pick up and say, "wow, that was really nice, OR, man, she's a great person..." and although it is not a bad thing to have people notice that you are doing nice things, but it's who gets the thanks and honor for doing these nice things. And if my answer is anything other than to point my fingers heavenward and say, "my creator..." then I am doing what I do, out of selfish ambition...and this defeats the purpose of all the goodness done. Man can even be prideful in the fact that they are selfless. Isn't' that amazing? We are rotten to the core, and it's only by the grace of God that we have any goodness in our lives as all. If you think for one second that man is "basically good..." think again. Think no further than perhaps, what was your first thought of this morning? Perhaps, what you get yourself at the store, or how you could manipulate your morning so that it would be the best for you....*raises hand* that's me anyways.

I'm always thinking about, me. Selfish ambition. Why do I do what I do? Am a resounding symbol or clanging gong? Am I ringing my bell in the market place as I drop my tithe into the bucket? Am I saying, "men, look at me, as I help this person, as I hold this door, as I lift this soul up?" do I do it so the eyses of the world to see? Or am I doing it privately, not letting my left hand know what my right hand is giving? Am I silently serving the homeless and needy? OR do I call up all my friends, or put on Facebook what I am doing that day, so that others may "happen to see" what I am up to. Selfish ambition. Oh how I loath my selfish ambition.

For in selfish ambition, there is a motive that serves self behind all that I do. There is a twinge of "what can I can get out of this" in all I say and do to help others. This is not the gift that honors my Father in heaven. And the reason He does not like it is not because He wants me to be a doormat, or that He wants me to be unthanked and miserable, no, quite the contrary, what He wants is to further the Kingdom the most, and the way He does this, is by having a soul who is desiring to bring the most glory to the Father, with the least selfish ambition that puffs up and makes prideful the do-er. I do not want to be a prideful servant. (oxymoron?) I am to be like Christ, how do I do this? IN HIS STRENGTH. How do I immitate the one I was created to serve? I watch Him I read of His ways, I breath is ways in and then back out again, I remain in Him at all times, and I strive to make my every move look like His. The only way I will know what His moves look like, is by studying Him. And to study Him is the greatest way to honor someone. When you "obsessed" with someone, and you want to be "just like" them, what do you do? You dress like them, talk like them, eat what they eat, and walk how they walk. Yes. You desire to become them...and in doing these things, you emualte the person they are. This is not some hollywood obsession, or some disturbing description, this is a life of a Christ-follower. I love my Lord so much I want to be just like Him. And in doing so, I pray my selfish ambition get smaller, and my appearance becomes more like the Father...and all who walk in this way, will be more like Christ when their hearts are right, their motives are pure, and the glory is rightly placed.

Either way, let selfish ambition have no part in me O Lord, that I can be the servent you want me to be, the do what I ought to do to bring you the most glory, to serve you in the best way, and the further the kingdom, not for my benefit, (for I know you will give me peace beyond measure and blessings in the form of joy and contentment) that will last much much longer than the raise of an eyebrow or a pat on the back from man. I want to want, what you want. I want to do, what you want me to do, ALL FOR YOUR GLORY...and nothing else. My reward is heaven. My joy is knowing that I am the child that pleases her Father...and my gift is that I am sealed, and yours. Amen