Saturday, December 10, 2011

Use me up



All gone. Empty. Dry as a bone. Bottom of the barrel. Belly up. Done. Finished.



Do any of the words describe how you feel at the end of a long day, hard day of work? I feel that way right now. But it's for a good cause you know. Every day as of late when I wake up I think this..." This is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice in how HE USES ME." And I am. All I can do is make everything I do, an Hallelujah. Why? As Christmas approaches I have been thinking this: A tiny little perfect, beautiful baby boy was born to a mommy, similar to myself. That mommy was young, new at being a mom, and her baby boy was perfect to her in every way. Although something was different about this baby boy. You guessed it, His name was Jesus. And this baby, was a baby born to die. He was brought into this world for one purpose, for saving me through His death. This is why I say, what I can I say? What can I do to thank Him? What can I do that will not just end up looking hollow or empty in response the magnitude of His gift to me? So what do I say? I say this: "Lord I give you my life. And everything that is in it. All that I say, think, do and walk through each day will be done as an hallelujah to my King. He literally sacrificed everything for me. His very breath. So that I could live. Who is this King of glory???? That is the King I do everything for. So it is why I say, "Lord, what is your mission for me today?" "Lord, give me my marching orders.." "Lord..I am your instrument, play whatever song you wish..." And I am delighted each and every time He assigns me with something to do for Him and His kingdom... I wish I could say I always executed every order He gives me with absolute perfection, but I am still fleshly at times, much to my sadness. But I am giving my Lord my every single moment, and when I get selfish with those moments, and take back what I long to give to Him, I say I'm sorry, and in my confession, He takes me back and builds me back up again the faith...and once again I continue on. This King, This baby King, who came to die, has stolen my heart. And I want to give Him all of me. My every single breath. My every single moment. I love Him for all He did, for how He meets in the quiet places. How when I open His words, His words FLOOD off the pages and speak in love letters to me. His words are the most beautiful I have ever heard, and all I can say is this: "Lord, use me up." I'm desperate for Him. I am lovesick. I am breathless and thankful. And my life is His. He gave me His life. Can you imagine? Picture this tiny baby.... and in His sweet baby hands nails would be driven. And when He grew up, He was so focused. Focused on the truth of His Father, speaking truth to me. He made a way for me. I am an adopted daughter...and He made me His chosen one. So what then shall I say in response to this? "Lord use me up." I hope you hear the desperate longing I have for Him in my voice. My longing for Him is beyond any longing I have the ability to quench on my own. Only His return will quench it...but until He comes back, I will live my every single moment for HIM! I thirst for more and more time with Him....if only I could sit at His feet all day...Oh Jesus. I cling to you.



As the deer pants for the water so my soul pants for you O God.



Use me up.



Undistracted devotion for only you. I don't want to talk about you like your not in the room, I want to look right at you. I want to sing right to you. - Misty Edwards, "Doves Eyes."



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