I'll Never Measure Up

Inside of every person lies the desire to be the best. And if not the best, as close to that as possible.
The desire for excellence is great. Even Godly. But, what happens when suddenly, my best is no longer good enough, because "that girl over there" seems to do it better than me? (at least according to my judgments) And so begins the endless cycle of comparisons.
There is a lot that goes on in this thinking that is flawed, and there is a little bit that is good. It is good to do your personal best, reliance on God at the forefront of thinking, prayerfully taking on each task at hand, and giving God your all! This is good.
Where things "go sour" is when we start looking at what someone else is doing and line it up with what we can do. We now have taken our eyes off our "heavenly Role Model" and fixed our eyes on a mere human model.
This comparison can take place in any field, genre or situation.
What is the reason I do this? Why do I compare my ability, my body, my home, my (you name it) to someone else's?
I'll tell you what this type of thinking produces and what it does not produce.
This comparison mindset only produces a self demoting mentality. Dissatisfaction and discontentment with both who I am, and what I can do.
And really what it points to is my self focus. "If I'm not happy with me, I'm not happy at all."
It shows that I am so concerned with me, (even if it's self demotion of me) that I will let myself and thoughts about myself get me down.
This type of comparison thinking does not produce joy.
It does not produce productivity and it does not make me closer to my Heavenly Father.
I am not saying that we ought to walk around talking about "how great we think we are." But rather, in our hearts, recognize that God made us individual, with unique gifts and abilities.
Instead of comparisons, I should rather think about I can "spur another on with love and good deeds" as the Bible states.
And how to build others up in the Lord! In doing so, I am already on the right track to forget about my mental comparison because I am focusing more on what builds up then that which tears down.

I've heard it said, "Always leave a room with a good word on your lips, and people will always be excited to see you come back in." - Joyce Meyer

And in all honesty, we feel better when we do this.
But there is missing piece here because lets face it, we are all human, no one is perfect (not one) and we all can do well at things for a time, and then in our fatigue our flesh begins to take over.

I am queen of starting out strong in the Lord, and ending tired in the flesh. How does this keep happening? It's because I let my spiritual guard down, I get over confident and I rely on the flesh. I essentially say, "Thanks God for getting me started, but I've got this now...." AND of course, my flight tail spins.

So each day I start in a similar fashion. In the Word. I know I am rendered useless without His instruction. It's my life line.
And it's yours too!
No one ever has ever, (EVER) in their own strength pleased God.
Rather, we rely on the Spirit to propel us in love, good deeds and faith. We live expectantly for what the Lord will do with our meager offerings, and know that the God who turns streams in dry land and vise versa, will do good things with our mess.

I start out the day often feeling insecure, insufficient, overwhelmed and a bit fatigued. (motherhood can do this to a girl) but what I find when I pour into the pages of His word is this: I find strength, support for the day, fuel for each event, words where there normally are none, peace where it normally it is not found, and joy in difficult circumstances.

In His strength I find the energy He has provided for countless people over countless years. He simply gives what I cannot give myself.

And in this, I find peace. Where peace lies, dissatisfaction disappears. When I am feeling dissatisfied with myself, my circumstances, my position in life, my (whatever) I have to start to examine once more where my eyes are resting, and in whom my trust is in.

If I have begun to rely upon myself, I will slip.

But God is my ever present help. (Psalm 46) and in HIM my hope is found.
HOPE. You need that today?
Peace? Feeling anxious, or inadequate?
God is completely adequate to meet all your needs, refocus your gaze on Him, (and off of that girl who is so much skinnier than you) and allow you the strength and ambition to be joy filled and productive for Him.

Each day I say this in my weakness, "Lord, propel me to do what you want me to do. Give me the strength to be who YOU want me to be today. Allow the ability and ambition to accomplish what you want me to accomplish and help me to care and think on only what YOU want for me."

"FIX your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith" Hebrews 12:2

Your happiness does not lie in being more like your "idle" if your idle is not Jesus. Trust me, only He can make you what you want to be. Only He can give you the love your going to need. Only He can turn your life into the story you long for.
Let HIM write your days. Trust me, His ending is perfect!
And, it goes without saying, He loves you, because He loved you, because He loved you first. Not because you performed well, sang the best, ran the fastest or looked the prettiest. He loves you because you are His child. Chew on that today dear friend.
And...ENJOY YOUR DAYS WITH JESUS!