Hope? Hope in what?

There are times I feel like I sound like a broken record as I write. And so I think, am I missing something? But I distinctively remember praying some time ago, that "Lord, if you are going to teach me something, teach me the lesson good, so I don't have to learn it ever again, teach it so I never forget."
I do believe He is answering that prayer, and it is not easy. Walking the truth out is never as easy as knowing the truth. I KNOW that HE is over all things. Living like I believe that is harder. I KNOW that HE is in total control, living that out in my life in my faith walk can prove to be more challenging. I'm not sure if any of you reading can identify, but every day can in some way or another offer me an opportunity to live out my trust in Jesus. Perhaps it's something as simple as not allowing myself to become disheartened in the face of daily trials, but I always am given chances to give Him my life in faith. It's hard to not be dismayed when the world beneath my feet seems to spin out of control at times and I am tempted to despair.
Do you know what keeps me from despairing though? It's a very real thing that keeps me grounded.
And yes, it is Jesus, but it's keeping in mind that Jesus is a bigger reality than the pain I am going through in this world. The image of my strong hero riding in on his white horse is an actual reality. I know it sounds fairy tale. I know it sounds other-worldly, but His presence, is stronger the presence of the pain I feel in this world. I close my eyes and I picture His face. The reality of being with Him for the rest eternity makes my mundane Monday's being to fade in the understanding of His eternal glory.
At some point, God made the reality of Himself more real to me. It was in this moment that I realized He is bigger than my pain, bigger than any worldly sorrow I may feel or see. He will conquer in the end, and my momentary struggles will fade.
Without Jesus, I'm not really sure how I would exist. Hope in "hoping things get better" feels like sticking a band-aid on a gunshot wound and expecting the bleeding to stop. Jesus has proven Himself to be to me time and time again, the only real source of comfort, healing and hope in this desperate world.
Again, it's like trying to water a camel with an eyedropper. The task is impossible. Hope is impossible if the hope is not grounded, and rooted in Christ Jesus.
I believe the Lord has allowed some cloudy years in my life to help me to pick my face up and stare at Him until the hurt subsides. I never really stared into the face of Christ when life was going well. When my daily life felt so easy, I was confident in myself.
He told me we would have trouble in this world, but to take heart, because He has overcome the world, and although this was always a nice verse, I never realized what a rock it would be to stand on in the face of difficult life circumstances.
My needs are all met, but  human emotions of course can take over even when needs are met. We were made emotional, but I think He made us this way so that in our search for emotions that would be stable, we would dig into His endless well of stable, foundational hope.
"Why would anyone keep trusting in a God who sends this much trial your way?" The enemy has of course sent this question my way, but I did not give into the temptation to listen. Because I realize that if my hope is in good life circumstances, I can bet that my hopes will be dashed, if not today, perhaps tomorrow. But when my hope is rooted in Christ, the one who spoke the earth into existence, the one who calmed the storms, parted the seas, saved an entire adopted race, and moment by moment extends the offer for life to anyone who will respond, I am convinced that this hope is well placed.
Even if our healing never comes.
There were people who died waiting for the promise land. But they are with Him, so their present reality exceeded the promise! He promises us He will be with us now, and He promises us that we will be with Him when we pass from this life.
Maybe you are in a joyful season right now and you feel bad that I have been through trials...or maybe your right here with  me facing a trial, regardless of where you are coming from my friend, realize that hope wrongly placed is deadly.
If we hope in tomorrow, we hope in something that will fade. If we hope in JESUS we are hoping, (resting) in a hope that only gets better when we pass from this life! Our hope becomes our sight, and our hope is sustained in Him until it becomes eternal. He shows me that my hope cannot be placed in good circumstances, although He does bless us with good times and refreshing times...but I realize that if I can be rooted and grounded in Him my hope will last even when the sunshine fades.
I wouldn't trade these trials for anything. They have been the best training camp I've ever attended. And my faithful Father has been with me every step of the way. He is my reality, and this life is the stepping stone to my eternal home. Remembering this reality, helps me when life feels hard right now. I can have joy in all the ways He shows Himself present in my life right now, and I can also have exceeding hope in the joy that awaits where there is no more tears or pain, trials or temptations.
If this life is all you know, then look again. Look at Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And as the things of earth grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace, I promise you, Monday- Sunday will look different no matter where you are. When He is the window that you look through at your life you will see things from a whole different view. Pain is a teaching lesson, trial is test, and joy is a glimpse of what is to come. Oh, I love you Jesus.