From the Depths

Way, way, way down deep below the place that hits the bottom that reeks of yuck and hurts like something run over by death. That is the place, the unreachable place, the indescribable place, the beyond your wildest dreams of ever figuring out or getting over...THAT is the place Jesus heals you.

It's the place in the center of your being, your very core, and it aches. It physically aches. Know what I mean? It's that thing in the PIT of your stomach that YOU JUST CAN'T SHAKE. That no matter what you do you sit and you sit and think and you think and wonder, "why in the world can't I break free from this?" I ran 10 miles today! I ate so healthy! I didn't fight with my husband ONCE! My kids are all so healthy and I partied like a rock star last night. Why can't I just be content?? WHY can't this ache just GO AWAY.

Friend...If I speak of something familiar to you, can you entertain the thought that something might just, maybe be missing.

What is it though? Do you need a new job? A new outfit? A new diet? A new husband? A husband? A new....you fill in the blank.

I know. Trust me. Oh how I know the ache that eats at the seams of your being. That will not be settled..no matter what you do. I'm sorry if this sounds depressing but man! It's real! Right?! RIGHT?! You feel it too don't you?

I used to wake up every Monday morning and think...how in the world am I going to get rid of this ache...? I honestly would say that... Nothing in my life was really that wrong. Except for ONE thing. The only ONE thing that would really heal me, was missing.

Oh...a lump in my throat as I write. I'll whisper His name so I don't cry. Jesus. That is what was missing. No man made, hand held, get away for a while getaway weekend of peace would compensate that ache. But literally, with ONE word, He stilled the waves. That's right. The raging sea in the pit of my soul grew still. The waves ceased. The ache dulled...and then disappeared. The longing? Gone...except for the intense longing I had now to know more about Jesus.

Friends...this stuff is real. This solution is real. You and I are here for something bigger than making ourselves happy each day. WE have purpose...and it's not the purpose you think. If your purpose has man's fingerprints ANYWHERE on it, it's not the right purpose. Oh sure, you may have some success, and riches, and you may also have things that the world says..."wow" about. But that's not the ONE thing I'm talking about.

FATHER. SON. FRIEND. LEADER. HELPER. SUSTAINER. WATER. FOOD. NIGHT AND DAY. PEACE AND JOY. NO MORE ACHE.

Are you interested?

Oh friend...

His name is Jesus and I needed Him more than air. I needed Him more than breath. He is the breath of life and once He blew over and through me, I knew what I was missing.

I get it. It's hard to believe that at one point there was nothing on earth but great expanse and God. And over 7 days God blew life into the expanse and created everything you now know and love. I get it...it's not easy to believe...but the alternative? 80 years and then poof...your done. gone. forever. ???? No wonder I felt the ache.

When Jesus swept in, and swept me clean, made me whole and filled me up, all I could say was "thank you" in a bare whisper. I have no thing I could offer in exchange..no from of payment but to say, My life will be my thank you...and YOU GOD are my reward. My hope. My Father and My King. There is no other, and will never be another who will give His life in exchange for me, so my ache could be gone. Lets be real friends...that next glass of wine will never fill you. That pedicure? trust me, the polish fades, as does the polish on your new car. Everything the "world" gives you to satisfy the ache will eventually fade. "I don't have an ache..." you say...

OK. I'll take your word for it. But I'm talking about me here. And the difference I feel? Death to Life. Night to Bright Day.

That is the difference the name of JESUS made in my life. His name will be forever on my lips and in gratitude of what HE did for me as He gave His life up for mine on the cross of my redemption? I dare not look, but I must...so I understand the gravity of my state before, and the immense chasm He crossed to make me whole. From the depths of who I used to be, He plumbed the yuck and filled me with Himself. The raw sewage of who I used to be was scrapped out, and now, I am empty of me, a vessel for Him, (this is my prayer) to live my life until my life in eternity begins...with my Love...the one I love...JESUS.

"Jesus paid it all...ALL to HIM I owe...Sin has lost it's crimson stain, He washed me white as snow...I hear My Savior's voice..."