Joyful Hope

You know that feeling you get once and while, that little pull or nagging feeling in the depths of your heart that says, "that longing for something has not yet been filled??" I have been thinking about such things since the new year has begun and I know this is something every human being can relate to. Sometimes that longing has a name, and other times, it's something you can't quite put your finger on.
But God has been teaching me about this. First of all why it's there, how to live with it, and how He fits in with all of it. Why it's there? My longing is there because of many reasons really, longings are just desires not yet met. They are a dream, and promise, and a future hope.. This in and of itself is not wrong! We need distant things to hope for, but things turn south when the longings fill our every thought. That is when a longing not filled, can become an idol. Of course, I as always learned this the hard way.
Now that I realize I have the potential to very easily turn my future hope, my longing not yet fulfilled into an idol, I now know better how to live with it. Living with an unmet desire can feel absolutely excruciating at first. You can go through many fazes of acceptance, to grief, to anger. I feel as though I have been through all of these. You want something so bad, at first you fixate on it, plan on how you will get it, only to turn up more dissatisfied, and now exasperated because you have spent all YOUR energy trying to achieve something that really only God can do. And the sooner we realize this battle we fight each day against our unmet longing is not our battle to fight- the better.
I drew a caption like this is my prayer journal the other day. Two stick people. One of them is me, one of them is God. I am handing God a bag. A bag of my longings and desires. And God, (who's arm is not to short to save) is reaching out to take my bag of burdens so I can walk freely without lugging around my big bag of burdens.
"Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest..." - Jesus

I can find many places in scripture where He tells me come to Him and rest my tired self in His arms. And I know that this is the secret to opening to door to my hope filled life. The last question I  mulled over in my heart and head was this: How does God fit into my longings...essentially, is He apart of not having the longing fulfilled yet? Absolutely. That answer was not the one I wanted at first, but after I thought on it and prayed about it for some time, I realized that God is the habit of giving us exactly what we need, when we need it...

"He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" Romans 8:32

God knows exactly what I need, and when I need it. His arm is NOT to short to save, and when I rest in Him, trust in Him and spend all of my God given energy praising Him, the rest of life seems to make more sense.

The one major thing I want you to know is that when we are spending so much of our energy on a longing not yet fulfilled, we lose a lot of our joy. Our hope dwindles and we begin to see life as gray, and really half empty.

(instead of half full) 

I sensed this change in myself and at first I did not recognize how this shift towards the negative even had begun but the shift was undeniable and those who live with me noticed it as well.

I hate that sometimes I can go to this place, and be so blind. But this is why I need a Savior so badly. He knows my heart, He knows my needs and meets there.  

Isn't that a comfort my friends? 

God is not a not God created by human hands. He is a God who moves and breaths and helps us to move and breath and He creates for us what He knows is best for us. And here comes the hard part for us as believers. We have to trust that what He says is true. That He truly is a God who, " And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who^[a] have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

I really need to be reminded of that. Perhaps you do as well.

You see my friends, as humans, we only see a small slice of the pie in the window to our lives, hopes, dreams and futures.

I always say "thank God for unanswered prayer..." for if He had answered ever whim of a prayer I prayed when I was young my life would look very different than it does now, and that is not necessarily a good thing.

I can have hope right now, right here and it is not because every single desire I have has been met. Every NEED I have, He graciously has met...because He knows what I need and I am not in want. But the aches of my heart, the longings in my soul, remain in some ways, however He has taught me to cling to Him with my unmet desires...He is my hope.

Yesterday and all week really I have been singing and praying for Him to "Be Thou My Vision O Lord of my heart..."  Because I want His eyes to help me SEE the things that He has in front of me. 

"He will lead the blind by ways they have not known, down unfamiliar paths He will guide them...I will turn the darkness into light before them

    and make the rough places smooth.
These are the things I will do;
    I will not forsake them." Isaiah 42:16

Isn't that a comfort? I find that verse to be one I highlight in my heart over and over again. He is leading me where it is best for me to go. And do you know what is written between all those lines and words? TRUST.

I trust Him, therefore I obey Him, ( I go with Him, I let Him lead me) for there is no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey. I sang the lyrics to that song yesterday in church and prayed with all my soul that He would make those words from that song cement in my mind and I would walk forward in that trust all the days of my life. 

I wrote in my prayer journal that "I can rest in that truth."

Rescued from death

E scaped into the arms of JESUS

Secure and safe

Trusting in Him and His plans for me

I can rest in a God and His plans for me that I know has my best interests in mind and at heart. He is my strong tower. My refuge when I am weak. He is my life my breath and everything in between.

When I wait in Jesus, I wait in hope, in joy and in peace.
"Be Joyful in hope.." Romans 12:12  Do you know what joyful hope gives birth too? Thankful hearts.
It makes me thankful. Do you know what thankfulness to God leads to? Worship. Do you know why we were created? To worship Him.
So one could make the argument that I am living out my "best life" for Him as I live in hopeful, joyful worship of my King who will indeed give me what is right and good, when it is right and good.
I love that. Don't you?