My "want" cries out...

I write from a place in my soul tonight that wants to claim the truth, that He has satisified all my wants on desires...that He is my resting place, my reward, my refuge, my "all that I need and want.." and most days, It's pretty easy to believe that...to live that. But today, I am writing out of my deficet...rather than my surpluss.
I guess thats ok though. He wants me to be honest, even in my weakness. For when I am weak, I know He strong.
"Do you know my heart Lord??" I ask Him. "Yes" He replies.

"Then why..." I respond..."are you not fixing this, and give me what I know I NEED.."
He answers, "because I AM enough."
"Oh yes," I say...and I with His strength, I stand again. And walk forward again. And live out His truth for another day...
It's my weakness that says, "I need this now. I want this now. I cannot be complete without this now." And It's He that reminds me, "My grace is sufficient for your weakness. My power made PERFECT in your weakness. I AM all you NEED."
"My heart hurts Lord!!!"
He responds..."I am the healer."
"I am empty Lord.."
He responds.. "I will fill you so full of what you NEED you won't know what to do with yourself! Daughter! Look at me...I alone can fill."
"But Lord, that person over there has what I want."
He gently, takes my hand..."That person over there, is not you. I have different plans for you my dear, and they are good. Trust me. They are good."

"I'm tired of waiting.."
Jesus stops...He looks at me..."My grace is sufficient for you. REST...REST in MY timing. I CREATED YOU...I know what you need, even more than you think you know. I am IN YOU! And I am in the Father. WE know what is best for you. Daughter, be still. Rest in that. Your deliverer is coming. He WILL ride in. He will rescue you. But for now, wait. Wait for His timing. He will come."

"Okay. Lord..I trust you. I will be content in you. You Father, have stilled my want. You Father, fill the void...the void that perhaps is there for MY GOOD...for YOUR GLORY...perhaps...the void is YOUR best for me, and I need to change my perspective THOUGH YOU of what I think I need. Father, will you shape my thoughts to fit yours...?"
Jesus smiles. "Yes. That is something I would LOVE to do for you...Let ME be your contentment. And you will find, even your voids feel right."

"But let all who take refuge in you, be glad; let them sing for joy." Psalm 5:11